It's been a long while since the last post, so much has happened since the start of 2018, and well, these 2 months just flew by. I won't say it was the best start to the year (it got better tho), but it definitely deepened my relationship with God, and just getting to know who He is.
It's been about 1.5 months since starting this thing called job search. And I never expected it to be this long. As much as I do regret not starting during school, but I also am thankful for this extended period of rest, to just be there for my fam and spending a whole lot more time with God. So many things this season of life has taught me: Waiting on God's timing, fully trusting His will for my life just because He loves me enough to know what's best. When the job search just barely started I remember a verse God clearly gave me during my quiet time -
"I am the Lord who teaches you to profit, who leads you in the way you should go." Isaiah 48:12
Though the job search has since felt like it's been prolonged, and sometimes it gets super frustrating to keep spamming applications and going for interviews yet not feeling the peace about most or the companies not getting back; but I'm reminded that God is a God who provides. I recall the time where additional skate lessons came about through a divine opportunity, right when Daddy kinda retired. It was kinda scary to be depleting your savings yet not knowing when this phase would end. But when God provided the extra skate classes, it was definitely a huge reminder that God always shows up right on time, never early, never late.
Just felt that I needed to journal this week down because God was really so present. The past week had left me thinking a lot, about the future, especially with some transitioning within my fam. Job search hadn't been the best and I remember asking God how long more did I have to keep waiting. Then came Momentum service which to be honest was really a blessing. It was on the series of casting my cares on Jesus and to not carry them myself. The youths were then asked to write their worries on a piece of paper and put it in a box as an act of surrender. It was super paiseh cos the leaders didn't have to do it la LOL but I told God what was on my heart and then I had this vision. Of me carrying a heavy backpack but the verse cast your cares on Him came to mind and the image became this huge figure lifting the bag off my shoulders and suddenly, the bag became so tiny and light on his shoulders. Felt like God was telling me then, why are you carrying your burdens? I could take it for you, it's nothing to me. (ok la tbh i was praying for 2 things HA HA) So that night I went to journal and fully surrendered everything that was kinda on my mind. Really felt this immense peace and joy knowing that God was in full control.
"Come to me all you who weary and are heavy burdened, and I will give you rest."
Yup this season in life is a lot on uncertainty, which God has been working on it the last 1-2 years especially with mission trips. But uncertainty also means leaning on God even more because that's when faith comes in. God's promises of his "eternal covenant of peace" has also been recurring the past week, so I should keep these close to my heart. No doubt this human mind is prone to wander sometimes, especially when things aren't tangible; but this start to the year has been nothing but a reminder of God's sovereignty and His perfect timing for my life. Apart from that, I'm blessed with godly counsel and friendships that have been nothing but an encouragement. And so I should be more aware of everything that God has provided instead of looking at what I do not have yet.
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